Cleaning & clearing out: 4 years later & still letting go of alcohol
This weekend, Matt and I were doing some spring cleaning, sorting out old stuff that we have accumulated. Two things happened. First, I came across an old bottle of wine. There was no desire, no salivating at the thought of a glass of my “old friend.” Just the realization that this must be at least four years old. Wow. I never thought I could take a break from alcohol for this long. Such a contrast to my old thinking, “Am I an alcoholic?”
Second, as we continued our cleaning and sorting, I found a wire wine bottle holder, the kind you collect wine corks in. I don’t know why I was hanging on to this relic from my drinking days or haze. Maybe some hang on thoughts of “how can I drink less wine” were still hanging around the last go around. But this time I was ready to let it go and release it.
You see, taking a break from alcohol is a process, it’s peeling back the layers, and I guess another layer has been peeled and discarded. This picture represents almost 31,000 empty calories and 50 bottles of wine! That's roughly $500 spent. It would be interesting to see how much alcohol was costing me in therapy and prescription medications. But right now I’m not really interested, because I am truly free.
Letting go of the old decoration was the last remnant of my gray area drinking habit... No judgment, alcohol is a drug. If you use it, be mindful and know that there are real harms associated with its use. If you can’t take an extended break from it without feeling deprived, take that as a sign you might have some dependency on the alcohol and examine it. There is no harm in taking a break from wine or beer and asking yourself real questions like is alcohol serving you, or are you serving alcohol.
Here are some questions to consider:
Frequency and Quantity:
How often do I drink alcohol?
When I drink, how much do I typically consume?
Motivations for Drinking:
Why do I choose to drink? Is it for social reasons, stress relief, habit, or something else?
Do I drink more in certain situations or when experiencing specific emotions?
Impact on Health, Well-being and Spiritual Relationship:
Have I noticed any physical or mental health issues that might be related to my alcohol consumption?
How does drinking alcohol affect my energy levels, mood, and overall well-being the next day?
Am I distant from God? Do I feel like I’m just going through the motions when I’m at church and in my prayer life? Do I feel like I’m walking in both worlds?
Effect on Responsibilities and Relationships:
Has my alcohol consumption ever interfered with my work, family responsibilities, or relationships?
Do my loved ones express concerns about my drinking habits?
Control Over Consumption:
Do I find it easy to stop drinking after one or two drinks?
Have there been times when I intended to drink only a little but ended up drinking much more?
Attempts to Cut Back:
Have I ever felt the need or attempted to cut back on my drinking? What was the outcome?
What challenges do I face when trying to reduce my alcohol intake?
Cravings and Dependency:
Do I experience cravings for alcohol? How strong and frequent are they?
Is there a sense of dependency, where I feel I can’t relax or enjoy myself without alcohol?
Alcohol as a Coping Mechanism:
Do I use alcohol to cope with stress, anxiety, or other emotional issues?
What alternative coping mechanisms could I use instead of alcohol?
Regrets and Guilt:
Have I ever regretted something I did while under the influence of alcohol?
Do I feel guilty about my drinking habits?
Imagining Life Without Alcohol:
Can I envision my life without alcohol? How would it look different?
What are my fears or concerns about reducing or stopping alcohol consumption?
Answering these questions honestly can provide valuable insights into your relationship with alcohol and can be a starting point for making informed decisions about your drinking habits. As always if you need to talk, please just reach out!