I would rather kick the can down the road than question my thinking. I would often think, "My drinking isn't that bad to have to quit?" A better question to ask is, "Is my life good enough like this?" Full of hangxiety and regrets, I just stayed stuck in a constant "groundhog" day.

I could feel the heat and anger rise! I just wanted to work out. Why can't my remote be where I left it? Just put it back. After 15 minutes of looking and searching the couch cushions, I went to ask for help. I went to my husband's office.

I yelled something to the effect of, "I am 'blanking' sick to death of having to look for the remote every morning!" "You need to tell your son if he wants to watch t.v. that he needs to put the remote somewhere it can be found!"

This is how I would often greet my husband at 6:00 am or 5 pm when he would arrive home from work. My temper at times was like a lightning bolt! I could be set off by the littlest of frustrations!

There is so much talk about self-care. I never thought of exercise as self-care. My idea of self-care was a glass or two of wine. I felt that 20 minutes of release that I got was worth it. At first, that rush was worth it. But little did I know that those drinks were causing so much chaos internally. I mean, red wine is good for us, right? (The answer is no, but that is for another blog post!)